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I have always pictured you and I being friends forever. We have known each other for a long time, and have always talked about how in the future we wanted to be roommates in college. We even talked about how we wanted to have play dates with each other's future kids someday. I've always called you my best friend, but lately it seems like I'm the only one using that term.
We've been close for five years. You've trusted me with so many of your secrets you don't even like to think about let alone talk about. I've done the same. You've read all my diaries, even the pages that I don't like to admit I ever wrote. They are filled with anger, and harsh words I've taken back. The part that always intrigues me though, is that you don't care. You know that I don't mean them, and don't hold my words against me. How do you do that?
Without your help, I don't think I'd be able to get past some of the things I have had happen to me. You've listened to all my stories (even the stupid ones) and have had something to say about each and every one. Your listening skills amaze me. You don't judge me, get angry at me, or show any disgust towards me. How do you do that?
I don't know how we could have been through so much together, and still have problems. I'm a horrible forgiver, and you tell white lies. Past conflicts haunt my mind, and you try to cover them up with fibs. I've already caught you in many lies, but I still have this tolerance towards them. I know you only mean well, even if it hurts worse when I know that you weren't 100% truthful in the first place. I'm not innocent either, though. I know that when I'm angry it doesn't make you happy. I try to control my temper, but I slip. Even so, you're still willing to stay by my side. How do you do that?
Though I'm not "mad" at you, I'm still troubled. I'm not willing to lose your friendship, and try to let you realize that. Whether you are oblivious or just don't care, it doesn't seem like my subtle hints about feeling neglected have made any affect on you. I'm still left out in conversations, abandoned at parties, and forgotten when we're around our other friends. Your personality has morphed into something that's unfamiliar to me. You've said you're still the same, but through your innocence shouts a new voice that's completely unknown.
You're breaking my heart. How can do you do that?
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