The initial shock is still wearing off as I write this. It's only been two hours since you told me you liked me as more than just a friend. My brain is finally starting to wrap around the fact.
I guess I'll admit it straight up, you're the first guy who has ever admitted to liking me. I've never been the prettiest or most popular, the kind that guys fall over each other to get to. I'm the one with the weird sense of humor standing in the corner. The strangest part? That's what you say you like about me.
This is crazy. We've only started to become good friends in the past three days. Three days and we learned so much about each other, but it's still such a short amount of time. In three days, I feel almost like you know everything about me, even though you say you know nothing. Either way, I still only think of you as a brother.
I think the biggest thing that freaks me out is that you seem so much older than me. You're sixteen, and I'm only thirteen. I'm just barely a teenager, and you're already old enough to drive. I've already pointed this out to you over and over, but you don't seem to care. You seem almost as confused as I am, but you said you're sure that you like me.
I'm so confused. Just a day ago, you were the guy who would answer my questions about other guys. Now, you ARE the other guy. Who am I supposed to ask questions about you to?
Since I'm being totally honest right now, I'll tell you that the idea of all this is making me physically sick. I'm not exactly sure why, because this shouldn't be such a big deal. But no matter how I try to brush it off, push it out of my head, and try to make it seem normal, it just comes back and makes me more confused. And now I'm just too tired to think about this and try to keep up a conversational banter with you, so I'm going to sign off. Maybe I'll talk to you tomorrow, maybe I'll figure it out by then.
***
It's been another hour, and I'm still as confused as ever. It's midnight, and I have school tomorrow, but I just can't make myself sleep. You've invaded my thoughts completely, I can't get you out of my head long enough to get a good sleep. I should probably turn off my laptop now, because I really need to at least try to sleep. You're asleep, so you won't even get this message until tomorrow night, but I know you'll read it when you see it's from me.
Good night.
***
Now it's been almost twenty four hours. I think I might've finally figured this out, at least I hope I have. Still, there's a tiny niggling thought in the back of my mind telling me that this is so more complicated than I thought, and that I have feelings for you too. But if I'm being honest with my heart, I know I don't. I'm sorry to be crushing your hopes like this, but I'm not even old enough to date yet.
Luckily, you don't seem too upset. Maybe that's just a guy thing, the way rejection can just roll off your back. Either way, I'm so happy that you said we can still be friends. It's going to be a little awkward, of course, but I don't mind awkwardness as long as I get to keep you as a friend.
I'm not sure if you wanted me to tell others, but I had to. There was no way I could figure this out on my own. Apparently, I'm now the only one who doesn't find it weird that you're three years older than me, yet you like me. I just hope I haven't made any of your friends think less of you because of this. I'll just have to trust that this won't impact them that much.
***
I'm glad this all worked out. It's been almost four days now, and we both know where we stand with each other. The whole situation is clear to me now, and I feel fine about it. The elephant in the room has shrunk, now it's more like a cat. We talk just like we did before you told me. Of course, every once in a while one of us makes a little awkward comment, but that's to be expected. Everything seems almost back to normal.
I'm glad we're still friends.
