Author's Note: This article is a follow-up (of sorts) to two pieces written by KeenaChan in 2009: "The Rumor" (ID 10182) and "Hate" (ID 10561). Though this article can stand on its own, I suggest you read them because, in addition to being exceptionally well written, they provide a more complete back story.
Life is like a spider web. It's really spectacular when you think about it - everyone is connected. Every single action affects the actions of dozens, hundreds, possibly thousands of other people. It's incredible, really.
Consider something as simple as signing someone's yearbook. It's just a simple thing to most people, formulaic, even; "You're so smart/pretty/funny! Happy I got to know you/have you in class! See you next year!" and then your John Hancock. It's not life changing, by any means.
But you don't know, down the line, what that signature will cause. Maybe one day, their children will pry the dusty yearbook from the shelf and take a look. They'll see your signature and look at your picture. They'll sit down with their mom and talk for hours about high school - her stories and yours. In the end, they'll be closer than ever.
Don't laugh - that was me just a few weeks ago, giggling with my mom about boys and books, crushes and classes. It's not as far fetched as you think.
However, I never thought that the Mr. O scandal would play any part in my life after I left middle school.
That's not to say I wasn't horrified when it occurred. One of my dearest friends (the aforementioned KeenaChan) was devastated by the whole debacle and it was impossible to see someone you loved that distraught and not be affected. But I never had Mr. O, had never even met him, so I was able to distance myself from it.
Time marched on and everyone slowly put it in the past, myself included. It belonged in Middle School, and I was an almighty High Schooler now. Mr. O jokes always bothered me, because part of me never believed he did it, but I learned to keep quiet after the jokes turned on me.
It lasted all of six months.
At our school, there's a huge schedule upheaval at the end of the first semester. Classes are jumbled, friends are separated, and grumbling can be heard throughout the hallways. It just so happened that this particular upheaval swapped out 27 people in my English class. One of the newcomers was a goofy boy named PJ.
Of course, I knew who he was the second the teacher called his name, but I would deny this later. It was stupid of me - everyone knew PJ's name even before the Mr. O incident. After all, Mr. O's ex-wife taught at the middle school and was a very, very proud mama. But knowing of someone and meeting them face to face is a completely different experience.
It was a week later that I actually talked to PJ for the first time, and our conversation went something like this:
"Hey, what site are you using to get your info?" (We were doing research speeches in class at the time) to which I most brilliantly responded, "Is it true that your dad's in jail?"
I knew immediately that it was incredibly rude and not at all what I had intended to say. Luckily for me, PJ's notoriously easygoing. He laughed, smiled and said, "You don't have to be so embarrassed, everyone asks."
With a beginning like that, his mother relayed to me almost a year later, I knew you kids would end up together.
Just a few months ago, two years after he turned his family's life upside down, Mr. O was released from prison. And it made me furious.
At the time of his incarceration, I grieved with my best friend and told myself he didn't do it. I was not angry until I saw, first hand, what he'd done to his son.
I have met very few people in my world that are as strong as PJ. Tragedy after tragedy had plagued his family from the time he could walk. I've seen people with much fewer problems turn to substance abuse. Yet PJ has survived it all and he's never stopped smiling. I envy that strength.
That strength also extends to controlling his temper, which, once aroused, is so at-odds with the rest of his personality. I've seen him angry once in the two years I've known him (much fewer times than he's seen my temper, it stands to mention), and it was because of his father.
I won't lie - I was worried when he came into school with a bandaged hand and surly attitude. Under questioning, he admitted that he "hurt his hand". Later he would tell me that he had punched a brick wall after a conversation with his father. After telling him exactly how stupid I thought that was, we sat down and we talked about his dad for the first time. I cried. While he left the conversation more at peace with the situation, I left it spitting mad.
If you think about it, it's ironic - one of the people that I despise most is someone I've never met and, until quite recently, always stalwartly defended to others.
It's just one of those funny things, those little quirks that litter peoples' lives. Something that happened two years ago that I believed would never affect me caused me to bear a grudge against a man my friend looked up to. It's changed the lives of nearly everyone in our small community, even those that never expected to be altered by it.
Someone twitched a fiber on one side of the web and only now has it reached me at the other side.
If I have to attach a lesson to this, I'd caution you to take care with your actions. You never know when they could make all the difference. Something you do today could save someone's life 100 years in the future. Alternatively, you could destroy someone's lives from the inside out. The pebble you throw in the water WILL ripple out until it's moved every last drop in the pond.
It's pretty amazing when you think about it.
Toodle loo, Whyville
-xoxo Alice xoxo-
