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The school year is starting up - again - and I am going into the 10th grade. Now, I don't particularly feel old but the inevitable future is clearly becoming a nuisance as the days, weeks and years pass. If only each and every one of us had a book - or even a harbinger - that controlled our destiny, then things would become drastically easier. So much easier in fact, that all you would have to do is read the book, follow the key concepts and voila your life is planned according to your likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. But of course just like the high school hierarchy won't cease to exist, this book won't commence to exist. And so we fellow humans have to use that little pea-like thing in our heads to determine our choices, paths and decisions. Personally, I would much rather have the book.
And so this brings me to my connecting point that will eventually get us all to the denouement. Right now with roughly 3 days to school, I am hyperventilating excessively. One reason why I am sort of cringing at the thought of school is because with every day in school, I will be one day closer to finishing it and actually being an adult; a notion worldly known yet totally foreign. I do not want to actually decide my life yet. Heck, I can't decide which body wash to use sometimes. However indecisiveness isn't my predicament; it's just the unknown that bothers me.
Then there's the setback of my procrastination and the fact that when I get excited to do something it alights a massively bright spark but it soon dies down and becomes ephemeral. Let's address the procrastination first. I cannot do anything right away. I must first open up my laptop, cruise around the net and THEN maybe realize that I should probably do what must be done. Of course, that's strictly impossible. So as an obvious "solution", I get a book, read a little and then once again, think of what needs to be done. I negotiate with myself only to reach the conclusion that I'm hungry. So you can see the pattern. This, for me is one of my biggest faults. Now let's address the second point. The fact that I get excited about something really rapidly only to give up and forget about it just as fast. For example I got a ferret when I was 10. I fed it and played with it for approximately 2 weeks. After those 2 weeks, I forgot about poor Paris. Of course, we had to give it away.
Now onto the microscope portion of this article . . . Allegedly I am a cynical person. Or so my mom told me when she did the hand writing test. (Something about how if your writing slants to the right you're an optimist and if it's to the left, you're a pessimist) I don't know why but I think I have no future. I am so terrified of not succeeding that I don't even try at all. I mean sure I get good grades and I'm on school teams and all that good stuff, but in terms of the realization of my career path I'm not off to a great start. All I know is that you must love your career because if you don't, you'll never excel. It's all interconnected. If you're picking a career based on the great salary, then you're not picking the best career for you as an individual. (Of course if you love the job and the salary is great, then that's just a lagniappe (a gift))
So here we are, you all know what I'm feeling. I don't think I'll have an epiphany just yet but I'll probably think everything over during the course of this school year. The point of my article, you ask? There is a probable chance that a lot of you out there are experiencing the same worrisome problems and I'd just like to tell you that it'll be okay and we'll all get through this and blossom into beautiful people.
Cheesy but true.
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