Who needs snow
When you've got a million supermarkets
Blasting "Winter Wonderland" and
"White Christmas" through their
Bustling, air-conditioned interiors?
Who needs ice
When you've got thousands of
Indoor rinks just
Begging you to come skate,
And maybe buy some expensive snacks
While you're at it?
Who needs a real snowman,
When you can buy a fake plastic one
To put on your lawn
For $9.99
From Wal-Mart?