Hey everyone! This problem sent into me was from Nateenka.
Dear Lolypop93 and all Whyvillians out there.
This is Nateenka, with my major problem. Here it is . . . it all started long ago in kindergarten, these 3 girls were absolutely mean. I guess they were born that way, and it passed on through their families to them. Or, maybe it's me. I don't have a clue, but I suspect it's them. They would always torture me, call me names like nerd or geek or weirdo. I soon thought ignoring them would be the answer, it wasn't. So, I went on and on and on with them bugging me. At lunch and recess, not only would they try to be mean to me, but also mean to other helpless little children. It was sad, very sad . . .
In grades 1-3 things got even worse. From then on, kindergarten didn't seem so bad, but then as time grew on, and I got older, I soon realized that they built more confidence in themselves because I was so shy and quiet, that they thought I was being so affected by it, it was hurting me. It was! It was hurting me mostly mentally, but they would also push me around. Of course my mother knew about this, but she didn't try to stop it so well. All she said was to keep ignoring them. Boy, was she wrong. Very wrong actually.
In grade 4, things calmed down a bit, after one of their members split apart. Her name was Alexandra, Alex for short. She was always their friends, up until grade 4 of course. I never knew that she was kinder then the rest of them. Wow, she was really nice to me. She told me that they couldn't "keep" her in their group because she wasn't mean enough or something like that. I couldn't believe it! It was so mean. Soon, she was left alone with no one to go to. But no, the other girls would not let her play with them because she was tiny, not mean, nor anything else.
Grade 5 was a nice year, seeming to me that Alex was my new friend. At least I wasn't alone. I felt so comfortable with her! She had many things in common like me. If I named them all, it would be pages and pages long. Sure, she was 2 reading levels higher then the whole class including me, but I still loved to read. I only started to love to read near the end of grade 4. But we still read! Also in grade 5 the mean girls were also very very popular. They tried to act pretty, tried to make themselves pretty by putting mascara, eye liner, lipstick, blush and nail polish on at the age of 9 and 10! That wasn't right for a grade 5 student. I thought they would drop that sooner or later.
Those mean girls kicked me one time, in the knee of course, when we were playing soccer. They said "Oops, sorry! Didn't mean to do that!" and I thought "Yeah right! You totally meant to do that!" But I knew they would try to lie to the teacher when I came crying to her. Sure, they did! They made up a quick excuse, and believe it or not, it worked. "Wow," is all I had to say.
Grade 6 was I would say the second most terrible year for me. Alex was my best friend after breaking up with my other BFF, but that didn't matter. Those girls were still the ones that got in trouble most and were mean to nearly everyone! I was happy with the teacher we had, she couldn't deal with trouble makers. I believe they were sent to the office about twice a month, if not more. I was glad to see that, after all, they were obsessed with hurting people emotionally and physically. I hoped and I prayed and I hoped and I prayed that they would either change their attitude, go into a different class in grade 7, or move. At least one of them.
Grade 7 came, and isn't gone quite yet. You see, I am currently in grade 7 right now, and not happy with it. One of them died her hair and made streaks, the other one made her hair shorter and worked out and is around 70 pounds. That's pretty skinny. The first two months in, and I come home either upset and grumpy, or sometimes even pouting or have little tears trickling down my face. I can't stand them! I try to make good comebacks when they tease, or just be plain old nasty. I can never do it properly or they aren't effected by it!
What should I do? Help! Please, or I may be tortured for the rest of my life!
Thank you, this is Nateenka, signing off, bye!
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Mattie's Advice: Nateenka, you are extremely right. Telling the teacher or an adult might not work with these girls, because they seem stronger than that. If they have already been sent to the principal's office even twice, and they are still not stopping, they probably do not care much what other people say or do.
It's like nothing can stop them. So what I say to do, is . . . revenge! But NOT in a mean way, you do not want to be like them in any way. If they say something mean to you, say something mean back. But do not get into fights or anything. Just say it, and stroll away. There has to be something they do not like about themselves, everyone does. That might be the reason they taunt you.
Say one of them was a big nose, or feet or something. They say something mean to you, and if it really frustrated you THAT much, just comment a little. "At least my nose isn't a ski jump." (Haha, get it?) Then walk away before they can say ANYTHING else. Don't be too mean about it, but I have worked with many others on these problems, and telling a teacher never seems to be the answer to them, either.
If you need to, get a group of friends around with you to back you up. But remember (and I do not know if I can say this enough), do not become one of them! Remember you are you, not a 7th grade plastic Barbie Doll.
What do you think Nateenka should do? Post your advice in the BBS of this article! Thanks!
*Mattie*
Editor's Note: I am well aware of the controversy surrounding this column. As always, I encourage everyone to remain respectful in their comments in the BBS. In the end, the purpose of this column is to help people and to have an open discourse about problems all of you may be facing. Remember, everyone is entitled to their opinion, and just because your advice is different than someone else's does not make the other person wrong. Please always keep in mind the Whyville Way.