Author's Note: Although it is a stupid song, I have mixed some lyrics from the song "Barbie Girl" into my article for multiple reasons.
I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world.
All right, so let me establish I am not a Barbie. Nor am I a plastic doll of any sort that most people have fun with. That is, the only fun that came from them came to us when we were young. Or in our present age, we still get entertainment out of popping their heads off and flushing them down the toilet, don't we?
I'm much the same way, now I only have a very close, small (two people other than me, to be exact) group of friends. They are the only people I can even force a smile with. When I was younger, I was the most outgoing child you could have ever seen, and I was constantly asking people to talk to me about yellow, or to watch me do a dance. My curly brown hair would bounce around my face and I would be simply delighted at all the attention I was given.
Life in plastic, it's fantastic.
Plastic is what I call "confining". If it's closed (as it is with a Barbie) it's hard to get things in or out. In my life, it's hard for me to let go of things I now love or hold close, these being my friends, the television, music, and, to my dismay, the Internet. Besides this, however, you can't get anything new into me, either. I refuse to let anyone talk to me, I refuse to do anything except what I do now. I would (as Monet would say) beat a person with a flaming shovel if they tried to take my friends from me, but I'd probably murder them if they tried to tear me away from the computer.
You can brush my hair . . . (Insert the next little tidbit here)
Oh yes, you can try to straighten my life, you can try to fix up everything that's given way. I doubt you'd be able to go very far without me doing some serious damage to your pretty little face. Go ahead and attempt to change who I am, you just go ahead and try. Go ahead and see what happens.
Imagination, my life is your creation
If only I had enough imagination to entertain myself for a mere five minutes. If only I hadn't let all those people change me into who I am. It's like an addiction as far as my Internet problem. I have to be told repeatedly to get away from the computer, and to do it now. With my friends, just not sitting with them at lunch will get me angry (No, don't worry, I don't have separation anxiety, or have mental problems). If anyone dared lay a hand on my iPod, I'd probably break their fingers with a baseball bat.
Looking at my 2008, I realize what a monster I've become, valuing friends far more than family, slacking in school (not by much, but trust me), and spending less and less time being the child I once was.
It's called growing up, and it's a difficult concept for me to even begin to accept. I lash out at anyone and everyone if they do something that doesn't suit me. I confine myself to my house, not talking to anyone, letting the outside world bounce off of the exterior walls of my bedroom. The only time I willingly leave the house is to go to school or occasionally to go shopping.
I used to invite my best friend over all the time, and she would always come. Always. She'd stay the night and we'd be up late, our giggles weaving through the house. We were like sisters, and we never went more than a day without talking to each other.
When school started, we were still very tight, but then we started hanging out with another pair of best friends. Two had become four. The four of us got along very well, until my best friend floated from the group.
Us three that remain are very tight and don't talk to anyone much but a few two or three people. Maybe we're afraid we'll lose someone else we hold dear.
My life has changed so much that it's frightening. Why can't I be that bouncing little girl who would ride her tricycle up and down the court on hot summer days? And who would dance in the rain and let the icy droplets splash upon her tongue, and wold laugh when she fell in the mud.
I want to change, but I don't know if I can.
Pupdog10
