do you ever feel awkward
do you ever not
know what to do
sometimes at night
i lay and i think of you
and i figure
it's got to be an act
sometimes . . .
you've got to
be less than perfect
sometimes . . .
have you ever been in love
when i ask you this
i really mean
have you ever been in love
with someone
other than yourself
can you tell me?
will you answer please truthfully
i'll wait for your answer
but . . .
i don't belong in your world.
i feel things
you'd never comprehend
you'll never know how
this can exist.
am i
. . . just another girl
you'll use
one you'll know from
the start
that you'll never miss.
it's not important
i'd willingly go
and abuse myself by you
your words, your hands,
your poisonous embrace
if i had a lucky star
or just one last wish
you know exactly what
it would still be.
i'd still wish for you
i'd still wish you loved me
the best that you know how
i'd still wish i meant
so so very much more to you.
morning comes
reality sinks in
all you'll ever be
is a silly fantasy
a silly wish
because that's all you've ever been.
