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MAKING FRIENDS
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HOW MIGHT SOMEONE MAKE NEW FRIENDS?
Friends are people to play with or to hang out with after school. Many people want friends but may have a hard time making them or keeping them. Whether you already have a group of friends or you want to spend less time alone, you may be interested in meeting new people. Building friendships takes time and effort but is possible! The tips below can help.
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HOW CAN I ENCOURAGE SOMEONE TO MEET AND MAKE FRIENDS?
Helping someone make friends can be tough. It's normal to feel many different emotions when you try to help someone, especially if they don't understand that you're trying to help. If your friend wants to talk, listen. Helping a friend does not mean you are responsible for fixing his or her problems. What you can offer is a listening ear and encouragement.
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WHAT MIGHT BE HELPFUL?
- Think what makes someone a good friend. What traits does a good friend have? For example, a good friend is someone who likes you for who you are. Then look for people that have those qualities.
- Relax and be yourself! People appreciate people who are genuine and real.
- Remember, people are unique. We have different thoughts, feelings, and ideas about many topics. Even people who you have a lot in common with might think differently from you sometimes. This is okay. You can still be friends.
- Be a good listener. When talking with someone, wait your turn to speak.
- During conversation, try to look at the person so he or she knows you are paying attention.
- Start a conversation with someone:
- "Hey, _____, what's up?"
- "Good Morning, _____. How are you today?"
- "_____, how's it going?"
- "Hi, _____. What are you doing?"
- Ask the person about his or her interests to find things that you have in common. Music/bands/books/sports/video games are good places to start.
- If you find someone you want to be friends with, invite the person to sit with you at lunch, talk on the phone, play video games, or hang out after school.
- If you invite someone to join you and he or she says no at first, it is normal to feel hurt. It can be helpful to remember that the person may be feeling shy or struggling with the idea of making his or her own new group of friends. The person could also be busy, and might get back to you when he or she has more free time.
- If you think a friend really needs help making friends or seems really sad, encourage him/her to get support from an adult. Do not try to solve the problem yourself, but instead offer to help with making phone calls or going to appointments.
- When you are really worried about someone's safety, it is ok to talk to them about it. If you are worried about your friend's safety - ask and listen! Suicide hotline: 1-800-273-TALK
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WHAT MIGHT NOT BE SO HELPFUL?
- Talking over someone
- Interrupting someone's story to talk about your own
- Thinking you aren't cool enough. Try to stop negative self-talk by reminding yourself that you have something unique to offer to a friend.
- Spreading rumors, criticizing, judging, or gossiping about someone is not being a good friend
Disclaimer: Material in Whyville's Wellness Center is intended as general information. It is not a recommendation for treatment,
nor should it be considered medical or mental health advice. Whyville's Wellness Center urges families to discuss all information
and questions related to medical or mental health care with a health care professional.
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